Get Your Head Out of the Cloud

One of the best parts of this job, is messing with stupid kids. Depending on the age and their experience in the system they will believe almost anything. I really enjoy messing with them with my beat partners. Especially to the point that you can see them start to shake. Which leads me to this story:

I stopped these 5 kids in a park the other day. They obviously had been smoking pot, all their eyes were bloodshot and had the faint smell on them. By the time I reached them they had ditched whatever marijuana they had left on them. So I ask the questions that cops ask "What you all been doing?" This leads me to a side note. Information alert!!!!!! COPS DON"T ASK QUESTIONS WE DON"T KNOW THE ANSWERS TO ALREADY!!!!!! Back to the story. There was this one kid who was completely gone. I asked him simple questions, "where do you live?". Answer, "Dude on that street."
"What street?"
"Man, You Know"
"No I don't"
"Sir, I really don't know either anymore."
I end the evening and our conversation with:
"It is your lucky night. I know you have been smoking and pitched some on me, but I can't find it in the grass. And you (turning to the idiot with all the wrong answers), You need to stop smoking weed for 5 minutes to figure where in the hell you are and what the hell is going on."
At this point all of his little buddies started dieing laughing.
The whole scene was pretty funny from the beginning. If y'all could have seen this kid, you would understand why this story was funny. Mohawk, Lip ring, blood shot eyes, slurry speech, combat boots, and a stupid "I'm High" grin on his face is a little description.

Speeding

So I am cruising down the highway to go get something to eat, going the average cop speed of 55-60 in a 55. (Cause everyone knows that cops don't speed to set a good example.) All of a sudden this silver Toyota SUV goes flying by me. So I have to accelerate 10 mph to catch up to her. I finally get the vehicle stopped and approach. I ask "You know how fast you were going?" to which a 31 year old new born mother answers "81 or 82". I had to have a look of shock on my face at this point, she actually told me the truth in a world of liers, to cops anyways. I reply "You realize the speed limit is 55 right?". She comes back with "NO SHIT?!?, I'm sorry."

This isn't the best story I have. It caught me off guard that this woman just flat stated her speed and then came up with that answer. I found it rather humorous.

Stories

This is going to be my place to share funny, sad, and just plain stupid stories that I encounter on a daily basis. Hopefully you find enjoyment as much I have, since I will have posted them on here.

ENJOY!!!